The past is already gone, the future is not yet here. There is only this one moment for you to live. Perhaps you are here because you’re struggling with major life changes or transitions.
Does the fear of change bring up thoughts or fears of the unknown and uncontrollable; leaving you feeling helpless and alone?
Have you thought of transition therapy/counseling to help or guide you through?
“ No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path.”
- The Buddha
How we deal with change can allow us to move through it with equanimity or otherwise, with pronounced struggles and with the possibilities of “getting stuck”.
Being both inevitable and constant, change can be experienced as a positive, growing, healing, and enriching. Endings allow new beginnings, possibilities, skills, and strength.
Sometimes we fail to embrace change; to seek and develop new strategies or directions. The alternative often involves increasing internal conflict and depression which can lead to stagnation, which, in turn, is harmful to our relations-including that with ourselves. On the other hand, we can relax into and welcome the process, and embrace the future possibilities while placing the past where it belongs.
Major life transitions can be a challenge - or worse. For many that leads to anxiety, procrastination, and avoidance.
"Be the change you want to see in the world."
Under pressure to change we may undertake to change others such as a partner, and to control them in stead of ourselves. We cannot change others, nor expect them to see and do things as we do. Focusing on changing ourselves is essential for resolving our own issues so that our greater sense of well-being can be an example and inspiration to ourselves and those around us. We can only control ourselves – at best.
Some of us may feel stuck or stagnant, in need of change, but not yet ready. That can be due to a life crisis or transition, or it can be a more existential crisis, which brings difficult feelings of helplessness and meaninglessness. Most people will see such a crisis as negative ; although it is better seen as prompting us towards change or transition. If so, it can be seen also as an opportunity and a challenge which will bring us face to face with often hidden aspects of ourselves; such as vulnerability, and tenderness. This can finally lead to accepting the need for and welcoming change with openness. Your past dealings with change may have been unhappy because you lacked the tools and the maturity.
Perhaps now with the help of therapy you may be able to accept or choose to make major change in your life; whether in career, lost relationships, lifestyle, and/or the spiritual realm. As creatures of habit facing the fact that, fundamentally, life is the change we fear most, and which can bring sustained and uncomfortable feelings. Our brains are often wired for things to stay as they are; i.e. safe. Facing change we may feel stressed, fearful, anxious and even experience panic attacks accompanied by a sense of helplessness and doom.
We do have the wherewithal to choose to learn and to adapt, to be open and welcoming of change, of the unexpected. We can become part of the process by making and becoming the change. Life itself is transient and change is a constant. In transitions we recall previous episodes in our lives, mostly as times of uncertainty, loss, and acceptance or letting go.
…losses and mourning particularly trigger us to revisit prior such experiences. Staying present and anchored in the moment can be supportive.
There are numerous stages or "seasons" in our lives; and learning to adapt positively leads to growth and greater self-awareness and acceptance. The process can become an opportunity for opening space for ourselves quiet time, for pauses, observations, and reflection. Some of life's richest experiences can result from this in the form of self-renewal, opening fresh emotions, connecting and sharing with others, and our own consciousness. This may or may not involve our own existential strategies, re-examining our own meaning, purpose, and direction. New and revised perspectives will inevitably emerge.
You may find you are at an important turning point in your life. Counselling, therapy considers your concerns, blind spots, imagination, and everything which touches you.